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Book of Pearls
1st Endowment
2nd Endowment
3rd Endowment
4th Endowment
5th Endowment
6th Endowment
7th Endowment

Chapter 16

Harbored Anger, Injured Pride

Shaemdiel refuses to gather his children for protection – Shaemdiel believes the Gods weak and scared – Rutheniel gathers her lineage alone – All of Elohim gathers, Shaemdiel is absent – Ahmans go to Olaha Shinehah to observe the coming of the Dread Savior – Rutheniel, Michael and Sher-el visit Shaemdiel – Rutheniel: “Why have you separated yourself from us?” – Shaemdiel speaks: a prideful defense –Michael speaks: Precaution is not cowardice, but wisdom – Obedience to God not weakness but strength – Obey not because of fear, but love – Nature of the Gods – Shaemdiel appears to reconsider – Yaldabaoth gathers his power and strikes the nearest sun – Terrestrial destruction – A flashing light halts the Darkness – Yaldabaoth taunts the light – The Dread Savior: unyielding and filled with love – The light calmly responds to Yaldabaoth’s tauntings – The Ahmans watch as opposites meet


1  Thus did The One and Areta fashion the very Keep, to make therein a place of refuge for the young and innocent; to preserve them from such harm as Yaldabaoth would fling upon them; for the Keep was appointed to be that place where danger dare not intrude, to keep most safe the beauty and joy, the life and wisdom of all the Heavens together.

2  But among all the Gods and Goddesses was there one who proved most discontent and inward agitated, being himself most reluctant in placing the children of his lineage within the very Keep; being in his private heart most chafed and irritated in yielding up his children into the care of The One and Areta together.

3  For inwardly did Shaemdiel seethe with injured pride, believing the Gods sufficient in strength and power to withstand the enemy which had gathered at the gates of Heaven; believing in his secret heart that in placing the innocent within the Keep did all the Gods proclaim their weakness and their fear.

4  Thus was it needful that Rutheniel go forth alone to gather from the Heavens the children which she loved; for Shaemdiel would not, being himself lost in wounded pride, to sit himself alone in the gardens of Salem.

5  And when all the children were made secure, then did the Gods most quick return, to see what next they might do in defending well the holy places; and there gathered between the temple of the Archons and the temple of Valhaladea even all the Elohim, save one.

6  For Shaemdiel would not attend, being himself wounded by inward pride, to become himself a victim of the Nemesis which sought to cast into ruin and shadow, the kingdoms of the Light.

7  Now the Elohim in solemn assembly did appoint that Ahman should go forth unto Olaha Shinehah, and there observe the coming forth of that Dread Savior which was born of The One and Areta; and with the Ahman of Elohim went the Ahmans of all the other Councils of the Seven Lights.

8  And in the sending forth of his Father did Shaemdiel not attend, being himself restrained by pride; and there came into the garden to stand before him, Rutheniel his own Beloved, and with her stood Michael and his wife Sher-el.

9  And Rutheniel spoke unto Shaemdiel, saying: “Tell me Beloved: Why have you separated yourself from us? Why have you withheld your hand from mine in the gathering of our lineage, to make safe the innocent which are come from us?

10  Speak, my Love, and I will hear; to bear in my soul such troubles as do arise within you because of this evil which stands even at our doors; for together shall we prove greater than such perplexities as do afflict your heart and mind.”

11  But Shaemdiel in the hearing of these things was filled with great disdain. And he spoke, saying: “Do you think I fear this scourge which stands upon our very steps? Do you think that I am troubled because the Seraphim were made defeated before this Nemesis which taunts and challenges the very Gods of Heaven?

12  The Gods forbid that I should feel these things! For it is not fear which disturbs my soul, but rather anger and insult; these are the things which becloud the heart and mind, to fill me up with hurt and indignation.

13  Who is this creature, this vile and pestilent Darkness which would challenge the very Heavens, as though the Gods should prove themselves as weak and ineffectual? Why should we be made to scurry about and hide our children as though we were afraid and filled with tremblings?

14  For this I tell you with utmost certainty, that in hiding away our children do we proclaim aloud our fear; and it is this fear which would inspire the Darkness to intrude even further into our realms to cast us into ruin.

15  By such means are we made to appear as cowards who do but shrink and hide away; to surrender in fear before the clash of any battle or fearsome contest be seen or heard; throwing away as irksome dross, the dignity and integrity of all our sacred honor.

16  Is this the action of Gods? Shall we appear ourselves as frightful children who peep and hide away until there should come forth some savior to save us? Shall we content ourselves with sitting and deliberating while this Darkness continues in threatening the very Heavens?

17  No! This I will not do; it must not be allowed. Am I not the Chief Archon of the House of Archons? Did I not bring to the regions of Kolob the very stars of Ashengaard while yet the Gods rambled on in calm and careful debate?

18  Let us test for ourselves the power of that yonder Darkness which scattered so easily the very Seraphim; let us match it might for might. And if it prove itself an equal, then shall there be time enough to reason, both the Darkness and the Light.”

19  Such did Shaemdiel speak, breathing out his words midst wrath and indignation. But Michael spoke gently to his brother, saying: “My good and noble brother, be it known in your truer heart that precaution is not cowardice, but wisdom instead.

20  For if these Heavens be soon attacked, then does wisdom demand that we remove the innocent from harm or fearful injury; to secure the young and helpless within the Keep for safety’s sake, and this according to the wisdom of the Gods who dwell beyond.

21  Know then that obedience to God is not weakness but strength, not mindless but mindful; nor is it the surrendering of our integrity, but rather the showing forth of all our respect, reverence and trust in those Gods who first gave rise to us and all these happy realms.

22  Thus by obedience to the Gods Beyond do we reveal the worth of such faith as in us dwells; for we do not obey God because we fear, but because we love, and in the loving are peace and joy made to live and breathe and stir about, to fill the Heavens with light.

23  Why then will you perceive our faith in the Gods Beyond as weakness? Why will you perceive our precaution in protecting the innocent as fear? For in none of the Lords and Gods of Heaven is there found such fear and weakness as you proclaim to see.

24  Being themselves always faithful and fully trusting in such Gods as do but dwell above them, each according to their order, each according to their glory; for this truth above all is true and most revealing: For only those who believe obey, and only those who obey truly believe.

25  Thus in the Gods is there found no shadow of doubt or dark suspicion regarding such counsel as the Gods Beyond should give; knowing in the heart that faith without trust is false, and that faith without works is dead.

26  Causing that the Gods should prove themselves most eager in faith and fully trusting in seeking the will of the Gods Beyond; to see in The One and Areta together the only true star which would lead them on to even greater glories than they themselves can dream.

27  Proving through their faith, the goodness of their works, even as their works do prove the soundness of their faith; to establish in Heaven the holy and the sacred, to be themselves as Lords and Gods most calm and gentle in demeanor.

28  Which holy disposition is made manifest by peace and joy and gracious kindness towards all who live in Heaven, from the least to the very greatest, to fill the realms of Heaven with a goodness made rich in joy and hope together.

29  This then is the true glory of the Lords and Gods of Heaven, which glory is not defined by power, dominion or might; but rather by such holiness as the Gods themselves possess; being themselves unafraid of the Darkness which waits out yonder.

30  Why then will you think the Gods as cowards who do but peep and hide? Did not our Father, even Ahman, go forth to see for himself the doings of the Demiurge? Do those who fear rush forth to stand before the Nemesis, to place themselves in the way of peril whereby they might give a faithful witness?

31  What pride would compel you to think yourself wiser and more knowing than all the Gods together? What cause would justify that you should comport yourself as one made insolent and arrogant, to treat your brethren with such disdain and disrespect?

32  Do not, I pray, separate yourself from us, but stand with us as one; and together shall we most faithful watch the coming of that Savior who shall cast from Heaven the Darkness which would bring to ruin the happiness of our estate.

33  For if we stand divided, if you should separate yourself from us, to think yourself wiser; then shall the Darkness be given already half a victory, seeing that by his presence he should cause the very Gods to break apart, to be no more as one.

34  Consider therefore the disposition of your heart and mind, lest by your criticism you cast a shadow upon this happy realm; to become itself in time a darkness which would prove an aid to the Nemesis which lies beyond.

35  Thus has your overzealousness given birth in you, a pridefulness which you cannot see; which very pridefulness has made your heart intolerant of those who do not see as you see, or who do not think as you think, or who should by any means show a variance of opinion; to become yourself inflexible and rigid within both heart and mind – filled with condemnation.

36  Let go therefore, my good and noble brother, of such criticisms as do now cause between us this separation of spirit and purpose; but join with us in preparing well our defense of Heaven.

37  And together shall we most calmly wait the deliverance of the Gods Beyond, when there should leap forth upon the scene this dread yet goodly Savior who would contend against the Nemesis for all our sake; to earn for himself and all his kind hereafter, a deep and holy gratitude, filled with true affection.”

38  Such did Michael speak unto his brother; and in the hearing did Shaemdiel appear to all to reconsider, to let go from his heart the hurt and anger which did afflict him because of pride and overzealousness.

39  And though he seemed most humbled and eager to join as one again with all his brethren, still did Shaemdiel harbor most secretly the criticisms which he felt; to hide within his mind his deep desire to prove himself far greater than all the Gods of Elohim;

40  To present himself as one most worthy of greater glory and recognition; to be seen by The One and Areta as a God of consequence and great ability; to earn for himself a place and power which would fulfill his great ambition; to stand alone as one supreme above his many brethren.

41  Thus did it appear that the breech within the Elohim was healed, and that all the Heavens stood as one united against the powers of Yaldabaoth, who stood himself upon the very threshold of Olaha Shinehah; gathering into his fearsome sway the fullness of his powers.

42  And like a dark and gathering storm, like a swirling, seething, rumbling maelstrom which flashed and roared with deepening rage, Yaldabaoth struck fiercely against the nearest sun within the realms of terrestrial glory.

43  Fiercely burst the sun apart,
shattered, vanquished light;
once happy worlds now darkly lay,
swallowed up in night.

44  Roared Yaldabaoth filled with glee,
he shook with ugly laughter;
broken parts of broken worlds
in darkness drifting after.


45  Another sun he soon espied,
he leaped with mighty rushing;
more happy worlds he would destroy
midst dark and dreadful crushing.


46  Again the Darkness laughed and roared,
another world in darkness swallowed;
shaking the Heavens round about,
their light soon cast in shadow.


47  Drifting bits of shattered worlds,
floating off in space;
fragments of once happy realms
to a good and noble race.


48  Gasping dread, the Heavens shook,
their glory dimmed and paled;
shocked, confused and deep astonished,
their hearts within them failed.


49  Roared and bellowed the dreadful foe,
he challenged the Heavens round;
hissing laughter amidst the ruins,
a deep and frightful sound.


50  How deeply shook the realms of Heaven,
a thing you’ll never know;
when evil came to steal the dawn,
and fear began to grow.


51  For in the realms of joy and light,
where peace like rivers flowed,
the skies grew dark and filled with tears,
and suns no longer glowed.


52  Again Yaldabaoth roared and hissed,
to challenge all the Gods;
burst a sun, and soon another,
their light in darkness shod.


53  Yet in the folds of deep forever,
just standing by the side,
seven Ahmans watched and waited,
the stemming of the tide.


54  When quick and sudden there came a flash,
a light most brightly burning,
to stand itself before Lord Doom,
who roared midst awful churning.


55  Paused and stared and roughly pondered,
Yaldabaoth faced the Light,
which blocked his path amid the stars
to face his dreadful might.


56  Stalled and fumed the evil Darkness,
his progress firmly blocked;
the Light before him blazed and pulsed,
then Yaldabaoth began to mock.


57  “Is this alone to be my equal,
my one and only foe;
shall this bright light prove strong enough
to match me blow for blow?


58  Shall this alone defend the Heavens,
to turn aside my wrath;
does this small light have what it takes,
to tread so fierce a path?


59  How small and thin, how paltry pale
the Light to me does seem;
what kind of God is this which stands
amidst these broken streams?”


60  So spoke the great Yaldabaoth,
his countenance darkly seething,
which caught the breath and froze the stars,
his evil presence heaving.


61  But out of the light there came a voice
from one who would not yield,
with firm resolve, most noble heart,
who would the Heavens shield.


62  A God most fierce yet filled with love,
who did some pity take,
when gazing at that fearsome lord
which made the Heavens shake.


63  What tender heart behind the mask,
where fierce resolve did stir,
when Light and Darkness finally met,
when opposites did confer.


64  With anxious stillness the Darkness waited,
to hear some fierce reply;
yet came a voice most calm and soft,
which made the Ahmans sigh.


65  “I shall prove enough for thee,
when meeting in the fray,
to turn aside your fierce designs,
and bring a brighter day.


66  For words alone are not enough
to win the prize you seek,
and constant boastings prove thin and pale
when you yourself are weak.”


67  Such the words which gently reached
from out of shining brightness;
swirling darkness, rising clouds
coiled with fearsome tightness.


68  Darkly stirred the Lord of Doom,
deftly stepped the Light;
boiling, rumbling, dreadful sounds
filled with blackest night.


69  Blocking out a hundred suns,
the shadows flash and thunder,
to make the Heavens cold with fear,
filled with awe and wonder.


70  Thus did there stand in opposition both the Darkness and the Light, each resolved to win the day; and in a place beside the two did seven Ahmans wait, each concerned and filled with hope that goodness might prevail.